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indoor recess

by shore country

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1.
have you ever felt connected to something? regained yr faith in something that you thought was dead? have you felt like you were cruising towards a moment so important? I wasn't sure of how to work it nicely out -- all the car rides and depending on that boy to leave for the weekend freeing up the bedroom where I finished the record that I made for you -- though there's nothing about you, I did that for you, you probably didn't even known it. toss those other outlets that were tonal, endearing. now I wallow in the loud shit. it doesn't put me in favor. (masochistic or masculine.) it was a summer full of feeling unfulfilled. I always panicked when I said I would come through. I cultivated nothing more than a seasons' worth of content that the kids loved. I listened to that mix cd I found, it got in closer to the core of the art I lack. and now I wish I didn't lose it in the heat of frustration. now I think I got this... or am i being nostalgic for a place I easily slept in but someone tainted forever? the romanticized version of the tri-state experience -- I saw it there first but when I got it, it wasn't the same. I communicated poorly, I knew it from the get-go. more like a jumping off point -- but this goes beyond that: it's straight manipulation, and even though I'm so conflicted, I know just one thing -- don't do that to my friend. this place is fucking toxic. utopia's fleeting. I want to go into the big world. I want to jump into a big love. I want to listen to people who deserve it the most here. a haven for our siblings. education is everywhere.
2.
timeline 03:17
I'd rather be in a basement. but I don't feel like any basements feel like home anymore, so let's say for the sake of argument that it's a basement in New Jersey even though I know I wouldn't feel the same way there that I did a year ago, it's a place where I can go to be alone, when every weekend here feels like a fucking waste of my time -- though I don't know how else I would waste it. maybe I could lose myself, and think about drowning. or adapt a new persona for a new generation. I'd rather be on a couch somewhere. maybe that couch is in my apartment, or maybe it's in Sweet's. but here -- let's say for right now that it's a couch in Alumni, even though I know I wouldn't feel the same way there that I did six months ago. it's a place where we can go to be alone. but every text I send feels like a fucking prayer to the FCC -- sometimes hoping for delivery, but sometimes wishing I could take it all right back -- because, baby, I'm out here harder than I ever thought I'd be. is it working? is it working? God, I hope so. I'd rather be in a bed tonight. used to want to be in a hospital one for the sake of an escape. but here in this moment I'm in yr bed across campus. I had no idea I'd feel this way when I got here three months ago -- it's a place where we can go to be alone.
3.
baby boy 02:21
meaning to take up less space and such. the switch I saw, it rly fucked me up. yr on the clock! you owe some things to us. waiting for a better time to discuss. talked it out with a pal in another state. "before you speak, just count to ten, just wait."
4.
held you close when you were leaving. sun was rising, warming up too. the planes fly so low. I felt closer. went to sleep with someone no good. your old apartment is dark, and all the empathy has dried up here. I understand why she's concerned. having someone there to take care of you -- it's hard to find when all yr friends go out. when the year? it seems like one for the books. when you don't see romance in the substance. when you don't see kinship where's the fallback??? I'll try to hold up some standard, or an unabashed love of goofing off. 3am at Star Diner (shouts out HPN FVR). "they don't know you there but they'll know me."
5.
everyone knows you're a scumbag, or at least they will in a second. have yr fun on stage with the industry dudes. when you get back home to Connecticut, yr parents won't be able to look at you the same way again.

about

songs written btwn 2014-2015 in M33, the place where I fell in love with my friends for-real for-real.

songs recorded in 2017 at home in Kensington CT except for track 5 which was recorded in M33 in April 2015.
JT did everything relating to the aural experience - album art is a photo by SK in 2014 in VT

thanks to Steph Knipe, Jake Bellissimo, Ray Chalme, recording chat, The Stood, MHTJ.

"Short people be like"

credits

released August 11, 2017

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about

shore country Connecticut

bummer pop for sleepy kids

stopped writing songs in 2015! :)

jtomascak aaattt gmail dddooottt com

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